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Author Topic: A 21 Year Old Virgin's Struggle with Peyronie's  (Read 2354 times)

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jb56ii31

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A 21 Year Old Virgin's Struggle with Peyronie's
« on: March 16, 2016, 02:01:30 AM »

I have had Peyronie's since my childhood, most likely because of an accident I had when I was young. I was afraid to let others know and so I had always stayed out of relationships. However, I finally met the most wonderful girl in the world, and for the first time I decided to seek help.

So I went and saw the urologist in my area, but I was told only of the bad news...

The urologist started off by saying there are no oral treatments available (it truly came as a shock), and that my condition could only be corrected with surgery. The minor pain that I get in the area of my scar tissue (during erection), he added, would not go away even after the surgery.

Should I see another urologist? Or is this a common experience?

EDIT: My urologist never did an ultrasound to diagnosis my condition either. Instead, he simply evaluated my condition based on the photos I provided and a brief physical examination.
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NeoV

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Re: A 21 Year Old Virgin's Struggle with Peyronie's
« Reply #1 on: March 16, 2016, 04:11:58 AM »

See another urologist, a specialist on Peyronie's and have it confirmed via ultrasound. It is common for urologists to give you only that option, when in reality it should be your last option. A true specialist will give you pentox, cialis, and talk with you about VED therapy and traction, both which are highly effective if done with commitment.

Surgery can be a good choice for certain cases, but given you age, I think the other treatments should help a lot.

As for supplements Citrulline, CoQ10, Acetyl-l-carnitine may help for a start.
Traction and VED should help you a lot given your age and I recommend these the most. Traction in particular, research them on these forums.

As for the girl,

Again the big question is how severe is your case? If it is not that severe or noticeable, you may not have much to worry about with the girl. If it is noticeable and causes you discomfort, make sure you tell her about it in a positive and affirmative way. Do not come across as sad, needy, or as if you need her to say "don't worry about it," even though inevitably she will end up saying that if things go well. When I was your age, (I'm only 29 now) I could not understand how one could be positive and talk about these things, at all, with a girl while maintaining any kind of sexual attraction. You might be smarter than I was, but the concept of being positive and sexual with a girl was literally impossible for me, let alone even just positive in general, and I still have times when I struggle with it.

For some odd reason a lot of women feel relieved when you tell them about Peyronie's, from my experience. You don't have to tell her right away, and you definitely should not tell her "I need to talk to you," just let it slip out some time, even before sex is fine. I sometimes tell the story of how I used my Peyronie's as a pickup line, and had girls ask to come home with me regardless of me clearly stating that "I can't have sex with you." Many girls will be perfectly pleased to do other sexual things with you besides penetration if things went well with them in general.

Many of us, including me, have had our Peyronie's seemingly devastate our relationships. It can become a source of blame for the woman even if it was not even bothering her in reality. I was hurt for a long time until I realized the whole thing was a lie, and nobody but me cared about my penis shape.

The hilarious thing is, when you do find a girl who accepts your penis and enjoys sex with you, you almost feel disappointed. If things go badly, she will then leave you for not accepting it yourself, rather than not accepting it herself.

I spent so many years thinking I was worse off than other guys, that I basically rejected multiple girls because they accepted me. This happens on a more general or macro scale than just with Peyronie's. We all get programmed to expect something from ourselves, and just keep seeking people who reject us based on that expectation. It's a terrible cycle.

Remember to stay positive. If it helps, I recommend actually practicing saying "I have Peyronie's, it really sucks but I still am very turned on by you." It's a weird thing to do when your brain tells you it's wrong, but it actually helps train your mind to accept it and feel sexual anyway. None of this is your fault, so just commit to it and the rest is all good man : )

LFCE

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Re: A 21 Year Old Virgin's Struggle with Peyronie's
« Reply #2 on: March 16, 2016, 05:52:56 AM »

Hats off to you, NeoV, Great post full of wisdom.
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jb56ii31

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Re: A 21 Year Old Virgin's Struggle with Peyronie's
« Reply #3 on: March 25, 2016, 03:57:19 AM »

Thank you so much for the thoughtful response, NeoV!

I still can't seem to shake off this feeling of devastation and frustration I'm having, but I am glad to learn that there are more options out there.

To answer your other question, I think my case is quite severe because the bending is well over 40 degrees. The scar tissue that causes the bending also prevents full erection in the particular area, and so my condition is associated with erectile dysfunction as well.

...

By the way, I have a full time job and it's so difficult to make an appointment with my urologist, who is only available on weekdays. And, to switch to another urologist also requires a new referral from my family doctor. Is this also the case with urologists in other countries?
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Jonbinspain

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Re: A 21 Year Old Virgin's Struggle with Peyronie's
« Reply #4 on: March 25, 2016, 06:11:01 AM »

Surgery should be reserved as a last resort. And then, in the majority of cases, if the patient is sexually incapacitated. That was the case for me. As far as I can tell after 3 months or so, it's been very successful.

Apart from that, much of it is down to up individual perception of the sufferer. If it really bothers you, if it's affecting your life overall. If it's almost all consuming then surgery may provide you with the answer.

If you decide on surgery, be very careful with surgical road you go down and who you're letting near your dick with a scalpel!
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ewra

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Re: A 21 Year Old Virgin's Struggle with Peyronie's
« Reply #5 on: March 29, 2016, 11:13:32 AM »

Ive had it (I believe so anyway seeing as the curve is high enough to cause pain) since I was 8. Now im 21. Really gets under my skin tbh but the others are right, you just have to get creative and do other sexual things. Our biggest sex organ is our brains.
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Thinking that the impermanent is permanent will always result in suffering experienced as loss.
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