New, scared but ready to fight

[ledder]

Hi.

I'm 34.

I just self-diagnosed Peyronie's 2 days ago. I had been having some little nuisances in my penis, and some pain at night during erections for the last three and a half months. As I do not masturbate, do not have a sexual active life and try to keep my erections as few as possible (sex addiction treatment), I didn't pay much attention to it. I did make the connection between the nuisances and the erection pain, but I expected (hoped) that it would just go away. Besides I am now in Japan for some months and I though that I would just go to a doctor when back to Spain, in a month from now. Finally I decided to check it visually when I awoke during a night erection. At first I just touched it with my hand and hell that curve did not use to be there! Opened the light and saw a pronounced bending towards my stomach. The strong impression made the erection go away in a second and I went back to bed scared, hoping it was just a nightmare.

I have ledderhose disease in my right foot (three nodules), so I may have the genetic predisposition. Two main causes may have provoked peyronies: my masturbation addiction, I did it pretty regularly -but not compulsively- and thought i didn't masturbate violently some times I forced myself, and a catheter insertion to the bladder I had two or three weeks before the first symptoms. I do think the catheter is the trigger, but I'm not sure if the symptoms can appear so fast. The worst thing is that I just didn't have any real need to do it, just was hypochondriac for some increase in my peeing frequency (my insanity, my fault) and found the perfect match in a not so caring doctor who just sent me to do the bladder test. My bladder is ok but now I have a bent dick xO!

My first reaction has been a mix between shame and self-hatred for being so stupid to force myself into such a stupid bladder test and in my insanity expecting that everything would be ok, scared by the feeling of having a deformed-monster-alien penis, and depressed for thinking that now "nobody will love me" "they will laugh at me" blablabla. I also had a strong feeling of wanting to get away from my body, rejecting it, which I am fighting back, as I do acknowledge that I have had great times with it, not only having sex, but doing sports, walking, playing video-games, etc., so I am not going to abandon it now that the chips are down.

I am making my mind with the chronic issue of this malady, understanding that the possibilities of it going away are very little. I have been reading posts in this forum and I want to move fast to start doing what has to be done. All my life I have been an excellent procrastinator, and it has only lead to bad things, so I can try to do things ok now. I know too that staying positive is crucial part of this, specially as depression was a main trigger for my addiction. In this regard I want to thank the owners of this forum and its members for this community. Isolation itself can be as bad as the medical condition.

Also I'd like to add:
- I feel a plake in the stomach side of the penis and on the sides, but this needs better inspection.
- I am scared to get an erection. I instinctively feel that I will hurt so much (even though when I have had them it was not that much).
- I wanna thank my penis again for all the good service he has done all these years, and I want to apologize to him for what I have done to him. I am really sad for that. I do know also that good things are still to come in the future, so I am looking forward to it.
- I will pay a visit to the urologist who told me to do the bladder test. I do not want to get angry nor resent him. I will just tell him. Even though I feel guilty cause i feel my hypocondrism lead me to this, he as a doctor is also responsible for this and must know.
- I feel some little movements in the urethra, between the anus and the testicles, I guess it has nothing to do with peyronie's.
- I still have it hard to believe that I actually have this disease. I guess it will take some time.

I have some questions related to my next step:

- How fast can the first symptoms appear after an injury?

- I am not sure I can see a doctor until September, when I'll be back to Spain. Is there anything I can do meanwhile that is not invasive nor has secondary effects?

- Do you think that the lack of erection and/or ejaculation (erection only spontaneous at night, maybe every two days, and ejaculation in wet dreams every three weeks approx.) can affect in any way the development of my peyronie's?

- Anyone around is from Barcelona and knows doctors in Spain?

I will read in the forum so hopefully I will find answers by myself.

Again thank's to all for this site and your support.

Ledder

[surelywasadream]

Hi,

I've only done cursory research into recovery.

1) This isn't your fault in any way
2) I wish you would've stated the angle of your deformity, as well as shape of plaque, I think thats important if you want good advise.
3) I wouldn't do a thing until you are able to see a doctor. Make sure its not just some local urologist. He should be recommended by other Peyronie's sufferers, as a lot of urologists think they know what they're doing and then prescribe useless supplements and unnecessary surgery. You may need to travel for this but for your penis health its worth it
4) I don't know what your disease is but a large proportion of Peyronie's sufferers also have connectivity tissue type diseases that usually cause unusually loose skin, double jointedness and other things, if this is the case its usually easier to fix but also there is a very strong (close to 100%) chance that the bend will return after a couple years, provided you play it safe sexually, in which case its an easily managed yet life a long chronic condition. Not too terrible.  

[Pfract]

That was a great reply "surelywasadream"! The only thing i have to add is that there is a clinic in Barcelona which you may or may not want to go. Barnaclinic, from "Eduardo Garcia Cruz". But you can also ask for the opinion of several spanish members that are present here.

I am not living in Europe anymore.

[ledder]

Hi, thank's to both for your answers.
I have not yet measured my anglebut I will do it properly soon.
I have ledderhose disease in my feet, maybe that is. Good to know there might be a connection with connectivity tissues issues.
Great info pfract, i have heard about Barnaclinic, I will inform about it. Regarding the doctor, do you have any good references about him?

[ledder]

Hi, I would like to update a bit on my symptoms.

The curve angle when the penis is erectile is around 60% (i will do more measurements to track its evolution). I did the measurements while standing up, cause while laying down the angle was way bigger.  I need to measure length that and girth, still.

While flaccid i feel from while to while some discomfort (it's the plaque making pressure when the penis is at certain positions), but it's totally manageable, only a bit of pain if i touch the penis, maybe due to the imflamation. While getting erect in stand position it starts to hurt, like fighting agains gravity is too much, not that much pain though but enough to cancel the erection and to make feel uncomfortable about having further erections; erections while lying down does not seem to hurt. When totally erect, usually after awaking in the middle of the night, there is not that much pain. This somehow comforts me, as i see that i can have erections. I would also say that the shape of the flaccid penis has changed, and the lenght has definitely shrinked.

My treatment these last three weeks since i found out about my broken penis, as I have not been able to go to a urologist yet, is to do nothing (I am sexual abstinence, so this is in accordance of what i was doing lately; i have some doubts regarding that abstinence may have been a factor in developing the peyronie's, but meanwhile i prefer not to do any move in this aspect). I am only every three or four days provoking an erection to check if there is any major change.

I am interested in information of the oral treatment of COQ10 - Acetyl L-Carnitine - L-arginine. I am wondering about the health effects of this combination treament, short and long-term. Has anyone had experience on it or is there post regarding this specific treatment?

Thank's in advance and have a good day.

Ledder

[ledder]

I found out a couple of things.

I had a zoster herpes (not the genital) around 10 years ago. The virus is known to stay forever in the organism and in some people, when defenses are low, it reappears with mild symptoms. I have been experiencing these symptoms lately (and frequently every some months for the last 5 to 6 years). As far as I know one way to fight herpes is to increase the proportion of lysine vs arginine, but I have been doing L-arginine for two weeks and I fear it might be doing something to my (supposedly) herpes symptoms. I am checking with doctors, but it is difficult for them to tell if it is herpes symptoms if they do not see the skin marks, which i do not have right now.

Another thing is that in a recent analysis i had the reumathoid factor high. The doctor said that usually reumathoid factors are linked to collagen disorders, and i immediatelly thouhgt on my peyronies, which i told him. He was not much aware about how to treat peyronie's so didn't give me any clue about this connection.

Ledder

[ledder]

Update.

5 months since symptoms. 1 month and 3 weeks since found it was Peyronie's. Two weeks on Pentox and L-Arginine.

I feel my penis is shrinking when flaccid, cause I have a lot of turtle effect.

When fully erect it seems that pain is less, though I still need to confirm this. Pain while growing the erection is still there.

I'll probably cut L-Arginine until ask doctor. I fear it might increse my herpes symptoms.

Ledder

[LWillisjr]

Locking this as an introductory topic. Please continue posting in the appropriate boards on the forum