Peyronie's from rough masturbation? :(

[ktos100]

Hello all.

I want to confess my story and also ask some questions, maybe expecting some consolation.
I'm 25 years old. I used to masturbate very frequently for many years (10?). Over time
due to lowering sensations I hardened my grip gradually. In one day in the end of January this year I couldn't get erection to masturbate. Lastly I always masturbated with very very tight grip but this night I just forced myself to orgasm while flaccid with even tighter grip. I'm also clenching my PC muscle while M and this night I was clenching it very hard (in order to induce erection). And from this time my nightmare started.

Next day when I waked up I noticed half-ring like lumps, inflammation and have overall soreness of entire penis.
These lumps are under the skin and are immovable (so they are on Tunica albigunea)
I was terrified but not to state of panicking because swelling wasn't very big and I didn't have any hard pain;
I just calmed myself that if I break with masturbation for sometime it will heal.
One month after injury I go to uro because lumps doesn't seemed to fade away. He examined me and assured me that there is nothing to worry about and it will heal overtime - but I was not convinced.

Currently after 6 months from injury inflammation and soreness seems to be gone but I still have following symptoms:

• Soft glans - before injury my glans was always big and shiny, currently it's size remains the same as in flaccid state even while having hard erection  Glans fills with blood only temporary while kegeling or pressing my thumb on superficial dorsal vein.
  By what I read this can be caused by pelvic floor imbalance but I'm worried that due to very tight grip high pressure caused veins to expand creating some sort of venous leak.
• Weak ejaculation - before I was ALWAYS shooting at least 1 feet everytime, now it ALWAYS slowly dribbles. Also can be caused by pelvic floor imbalance but urethral stricture due to what I did seems to be also possible (especially indentations in CS are concerning me)
• Hard-flaccid - penis is very firm even while flaccid. Only reason seems to be PFI so not really worried about it.
• Ring-like lesions, lumps, multiple indentations in CS and CC exactly where I was placing my fingers. Not very visible but they are and surely they weren't before. I'm in fear that Peyronie's disease is developing and it will worsen over time While erect I already see very slight hourglass shape.

From many years I'm coping with low self-estem and high anxiety but this injury greatly worsened it.
I think that not sole injury is traumatic for me but the fact that I DID IT BY MYSELF. How could I be such an IDIOT!
This situation is greatly affecting my concentration in everything what I do.
Recently I had caused car collision by not yielding the right of way. This is not something ever before happened to me. Fortunately there was only minor damage in both of cars and no personal injuries
I thought about suicide many times in the last months. Only thing is keeping me alive are my parents and near family who I believe loves me and I don't want to inflict pain on them.
I feel terrible - every day I'm analysing what I had done and browsing web for similar cases mostly without success.  

I'm still virgin and never had any girlfriend - just waaay too anxious to approach any girls.
Now I'm thinking that it will never change. How could I potentially say her that I have broken dick because of my stupidity?

When palpating my tunica I can feel uneven & nonuniform structures in tissue like scars in place where the lumps are visible but they are soft.  Should tunica albuginea wounds heal to evenly smooth structure? How long correct healing could take?
Is scar tissue on tunica albuginea definite sign of Peyronie's?
I have no pain, nor very visible deformity or curving. So if things stay as they are now I would be happy - but future and the possible outcomes are overwhelming me...

Greets:(

[james1947]

ktos

Rough masturbation and/or rough sex can cause Peyronies.
I will start from saying that you have two problems:
1. You may have Peyronies.
2. You have a very low self esteem.
The second is much more important that the first, but you have to treat both.
Your statement:

...just waaay too anxious to approach any girls.

is a wrong approach. I agree that may have girls that will want something else that you have because:

Some shallow female never built a woman to go along with her vagina

But

You are not offering a woman a dick that just happens to have a tolerable life support system attached to it.

Both by Hawk
So if you will not approach any girl, for sure you will not find the right one.
Regarding Peyronies, you have stated:

I have no pain, nor very visible deformity or curving

Did you try to do something regarding your erection? Something like Cialis, Viagra etc'?
Finally, you should see a good urologist for diagnosis