Just logged in after months of not being activate, and a period of only checking my messages, my reason is: this fear and dispair really messed me up,logging into the forum was getting depressing, and i was craving anything that could provide a temporary relief, and somehow almost never gave in, while doing
nofap too,
i started to suspect its hard
flaccid and not peyronies, searched online for treatment, was hard to find a treatment when nobody understands the condition, saw on some forums people recommending anything that fixes tbr posture and sorrounding muscles or exercises that cause relaxation the pc muscles, so some of the recommendations included substanves,, so alcohol, weed, muscles relaxants, i later found out myself that sleeping pills lessen the pain for me, anyway, with all the negativity, nightmares and suicidal thoughts i dropped the exercises, stretches and w.e, currently doing drugs to the point my nose bleeds and liver frys, stopped caring about using pills that might fix my penis for the sake of fixing my penis, they became recreational to me, an addiction i suppose i could say,
started drinking alot of coffee, got my adhd prescription, on top of that.
And still taking whichever substance i can get.
When im not sober its because im sleeping through withdrawal.
Also messed around with supplements like minerals and i overused them and seemed to me like i was very close to death, yet only thing i could think about is that i didnt dispose of my medical papers about my dick.
So i dont even know if i care anymore or want to care bcuz everything i do is to escape the thoughts, even the withdrawl numbs me enough.
Logging into the site is far from being a priority at this point,
These thoughts i get when reading/trying to fix my injury and failing is one of the things im running away from at the end of the day, reached my limit.
I only want to either fix it or die frankly, and since im burned out i imagine if i do fix it il be doing that on various mixtures of drugs and buzzed out of my mind.
Oh ye, and nothing positive to contribute anymore, before any of that i was scrolling through posts, people were asking for supplements advice, i didnt bother answering anymore, cuz nothing seemed to work for me and many others here by my observation(atleast with supplements/unconventional treatments)
Kinda do wish there was a hardflaccid board here though, got lots of help as it is with that regard but i still dont understand whats going on or even what i have and exactly how to fix it and discord and other forums are confusing, i do see a point in logging in to help people in whichever way i can though, but it just doesnt happen.