Young Men Dating with Peyronies

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GaussRifle

It must be such a wonderful feeling to go on a date with a pretty girl thinking you can have sex if you wanted to without pain or curve or peyronies in your mind.

According to me,, I am not able to get into the modern dating scene and score a potential date due to the follow reasons  :

1) I have never had sex before. I have tried penetration twice and failed and that was before peyronies. I do not know what the reason was.

2) I don't think I can keep an erection without manually stimulating it. I do wake up sometimes with morning erections, but I don't understand why I'm not able to keep them without stimulating when I'm awake. Maybe I'm not turned on enough or too focused on the peyronies I see.

3) I don't see a reward in asking out a girl and put in hours of effort.... let's be honest here, for a guy in his 20s part of the motivation is having pleasurable  sex with a hot chick after a date.

4)Most Important point !!! I don't think older men understand here that the dating scene for young men is very different than it was for them when they were younger.   It was a Man's world then, its a woman's world now ! It is a highly sexually competitive environment  where women can have sex literally with anyone they choose to at the press of a button through Apps like Tinder. They call the shots and see plenty of men bending over their backs to have sex with them. It's hard finding a girl despite being good looking, well educated, mannered... etc..without peyronirs. Imagine trying to date with peyronies and making excuses why you can't even let the girl go top and having to explain why you can't go rough or have pain and not enjoying.


Just my thoughts that I wanted to pen down on this wonderful forun. Any guys want to chime in ?

26 year old
45-50 degree downward curve with an indentation on one side when erect.
Using RestoreX and Xiaflex injections
Taking coq10 with daily Cialis 5mg.

Mikel7

So I think that you had a bad experience your first time which has left you with a lot of anxiety.  This will kill an erection every time. Now dealing with peyronies has you dealing with another layer of anxiety - not good. You should not just be asking out a girl based on the idea of having sex with her.  You ask her out because yes she is attractive and you want to know her interests.  You enjoy her company, her laugh, what are her goals, etc.....

I know today with cell phones and the social crap media everywhere things can get distorted. If you don't give up you will find an awesome girl who is not into all of the dating app garbage. One who likes you for you! Who enjoys your company and your stories and yes one who can understand what you are going through. Guys don't share their emotional side enough and that is part of the problem.
Lump April 2020, age 61 , Dr Levine 6-26-20,
Dorsal Curve 11-1-20 , Peyronies
Vit E400mg, COQ10, ALCAR, Heat Therapy, Penimaster, Pentox, Cialis, Restorex
had SNHL 7-31-20 - Stopped all Meds because ototoxicity  Heat/traction/VED are working.

Andy_1492

Regarding point 1) &  2) I think this is probably psychological. I had similar concern before my first time and I struggled the first few times but when you get confidence this stopped being such an issue.
I found that once I got hard I could maintain a satisfactory erection - not sure what the situation is now following recent developments.
Unlike you I don't really get morning or spontaneous erections and haven't for years. I need manual stimulation to get an erection in the first place but a lot of men are like this, hence foreplay.

I relate to 3), I often think it isn't worth the effort. A  lot (though by no means all) girls these days are shallow and I can't really be bothered with them.
Might just be I'm getting older and the British climate, but I'd often rather just have a cup of tea and read a book.







30 yo - Single
Dent and relatively mild Erectile Dysfunction 2012
Worsening in 2021 with a slight curvature and increased indentation
1000mg l-arginine/500mg l-carnitine/133mg Vit E

Hawk

Yeh, most of us came along back in the day when women who wanted sex had difficulty finding someone to have sex with them.   ???
Prostatectomy 2004, radiation 2009, currently 70 yrs old
After pills, injections, VED - Dr Eid, Titan 22cm implant 8/7/18
[url=http://www.peyroniesforum.net/index.php/topic,872.0.html]Hawk - Updated 10/27/18 - Peyronies Society Forums[/url]

GaussRifle

Hahahaha, not saying that Hawk. But I think in your 20s, and please correct me if wrong Hawk,  I'm sure the woman would be limited to date the person she met at office, grocery, your neighborhood, local bar . Her potentials romantic partners would what  .... less than 20 to 30 men ?

Not like now, where she can see thousands of men sending her text messages day and night asking her to sleep with them and willing to do anything for them.  A girl friend of mine that isn't even very hot had thousand of matches on tinder sending her messages day and night in my city. She is spoiled  for choice and thinks she's a queen, in which case if any man lacks majorly in any area , she can easily choose another dude. Any guy becomes replaceable at the press of a button. :-[

Also, my intent is to not complain. It is what it is and somehow we have to deal with it and move on. I'm just explaining what goes on in my mind psychologically looking at today's dating scene.

Actually I'd love to hear from Hawk and some senior members out here if they are willing to share .... how was dating for you guys back in your 20s or 30s. It'd be fun to know how times have changed or not ...
Hahaha. ;D
26 year old
45-50 degree downward curve with an indentation on one side when erect.
Using RestoreX and Xiaflex injections
Taking coq10 with daily Cialis 5mg.

Bud luck

Back in the 90's and early 2000's we didn't have the dating apps, if you wanted to have sex you had to approach women, so like you said, women didn't have so many choices, because only few men were approaching them due to fair of being rejected. But now with apps any woman gets hit by hundreds of men daily. Now with screw up penis I don't have to worry about that anymore, now I focus on making as much money as I can, women are no longer a distraction for me.
My first symptoms started early in 2019
I tried Traction device, Pentofixiline, Q10, TRT, L-Argenine, cialis
I have narrowing/dent/hinge on the left side of my shaft
My Erectile Dysfunction is getting worse
Had a PRP shot Aug 2021
I have a girlfriend
Age 46

20yo

i don't agree with the view of finding romantic relationship as if it was literally a market deal.
a girl can have 200 people that like her but if you attract her with your charm, skill, qualities, whatever,  you can conquer her. no matter how many people like her.
she is not necessarily harder to get only because she's liked. it might be but it might not.
also, of the 200 people that message her, how many only want to have sex? how many are rude and inconsiderate?
there are many things to look at, beside sexual function. so we can work on what we can change.

yes the internet allows girls to message with many more guys.
it allows you to message with many more girls too. it works both ways
20 yo, Peyronies Disease 2020(55 degrees down) + congenital curve
loss of length, stable erection, sensation. hourglassing
antioxidants, hyaluronic acid injected & oral, maybe Yachia in future
Recently started VED 2x a week
Still wants sex and a relationship

Hawk

Gaussrifle,

In my opinion, this whole topic reflects the actual psychological problem (since this is the "Psychological Aspects" board.  The problem is that you spend enough time obsessing over negative fantasies to put such a post together in your mind and type it out.  You allow your brain to be your enemy.  Have you ever heard of the concept of allowing negative thoughts to pass by?  Do you know how to do it?  Do you practice it? --- Well, strike that last question.  The answer to that one is apparent.

The problem - Obsessing on negative thoughts to the point that you develop an utterly illogical hypothesis and then type it out and speak on its behalf.  Peyronies Disease is not what interferes with your dating so much as WHAT YOU THINK about Peyronies Disease/Dating that interferes.  It robs you of any sense of joy.  If that is true (and it is), then the solution is to spend time learning productive life-changing ways to spend your time.  It is to give your mind things to do other than needlessly make you miserable.  How you do that is sound science.  It is not theory, faith, or just hope.  The next time you start to ruminate over such bunk, you can:
1. Sit and play negative fantasies out in your mind
2. Jump on the forum and argue that such nonsense is true and has no solution. 
3. Go to the resource section at the top of this board and go to work, and change everything.

Oh, and though I should not even waste time on this, I will. 
False fantasies
1. Women can have sex with anyone - There are literally over a billion men that no woman can have sex with for a vast assortment of reasons.  Here are just a few. (False)
   A. They are faithful to a partner
   B. They are not attracted
   C. They have physical limitations
   D. Geographical boundaries
   E. They are busy having sex with another hook-up
   F. Religious commitments
   G. They are not shallow (they are looking for meaningful relationships with people of substance)


2. Thirty years ago, women could not be choosey because of a limited selection.  (False)

  A.You are clearly talking about very casual, shallow sexual encounters (women finding hook-ups on the internet).  A woman into causal sex hook-ups could go to a bar and leave with one (or a few) of the men for casual sex.  People with no scruples have always found each other.

  B. Whether a woman has 40 contacts or 40 thousand theoretical contacts makes no difference.  The numbers are counterfeit.  She still has to invest time in all the things that make hook-up happen.  This limits her selection and makes all the numbers theoretical.

  C. Thousands of other women just like her (no values) are competing for the same pool of eligible men with no values. Access to the pool did not just happen for the women you are interested in.  One could argue it is a "man's world" because women on such sites compete for men.

  D. Only your manner of thinking keeps you from being the guy they compete for.

  E. Such casual encounters will only bring you or any man, regardless of how healthy, to an empty, sad end.  Happiness is found in mutually committed relationships that endure.  You have as much access to those as any other man or woman.

Stop investing time and energy into destructive fantasies.  Instead, embrace reality.
Prostatectomy 2004, radiation 2009, currently 70 yrs old
After pills, injections, VED - Dr Eid, Titan 22cm implant 8/7/18
[url=http://www.peyroniesforum.net/index.php/topic,872.0.html]Hawk - Updated 10/27/18 - Peyronies Society Forums[/url]

dorothymulinix5

It must be so discouraging and frustrating to not be able to enjoy sex or even go on a date due to your condition. I can only imagine how tough it must be for you, especially since you're still relatively young.

FrankPD

 Actually GaussRifle does make valid points.

I think it's def your anxiety.  It's tough when you've never done it before.  Also you should be looking for a girl that you'd like to get to know and have a friendship with, enjoy each other's company.  When the time comes, you can explain you had an injury and you have to be careful.  If she cares about you, she'll understand.  That's my plan next time. 

Hope this helps.
Age 46
No injury
Diagnosis January 2022  
Have plaque
Hourglassing when flaccid and semi-erect
Still have my congenital curve, no severe curving
Massaging with vitamin E cream twice a day 
Low carb diet
Discomfort/aching sometimes
Best to all!