Getting to a conclusion

[Jack1909]

I think it's just about either living sexless or getting an implant, and I may choose the first one. I've been experiencing great progresses, I'm living abroad now, feeling is good, I like my penis I don't care too much about the deviation. I mean I still have pain, my left side is still under a neuropathy thing..but, I found a way to deal with it and I really made mine the feeling they are really not an obstacle towards a sexual pleasing life. But it took me years to get where I'm now, feeling kind of ok with my penis and I do believe in here people always underestimate the big deal can be going down the route of having surgery, and maybe another one. It indeed took me a long time to recover mentally, taking planes going up and down through Europe really f...k my mind. At this point the only big thing keeping me away from having intercourse is functionality, despite meds, despite ved, despite shockwaves...but I don't really feel I'm going for an implant anytime soon. I don't wanna feel my body changing again and Eid himself told me: "it's about to getting used to a new nature". And I already did, I can't ask my mind to adapt again.

[Hawk]

The mind is the most adaptable thing in the universe.  In fact, adapting to new things is what keeps the mind strong.

[20yo]

hey jack.
so do you think you managed to come to terms with living sexless and accepted it? i thought about it many times but i feel like the sex drive will always be there and make me suffer. but i'm not sure if i will be able to adapt. i got the disease relatively recently so i still am far from having accepted it.
also, do you plan on having a romantic relationship?
my therapist says i should find other ways to "have sex" because sexuality, and physical contact with another body, can be expressed in a variety of ways so I should explore.
I think if I give up on relationship altogether, although it might be easier for me not having to face the problem, it will on the long run make me suffer more, feeling as if i haven't lived
can I ask how much time it took for you to feel better about your condition and how you managed to do it?
I am grateful for anything you are willing to share because as I said I recently got the disease and I'm deep into the depression at the moment

[Jack1909]

I've been trying for 14 years to improve my condition and I felt terrible for the last 8 years.  I'm not saying I'm giving up but I'm stating many people in here tend to underestimate the impact of an implant. That's must be a reason if often doctors and therefore literature suggest a post operative supportive therapy. But don't get me wrong, I'm not here to degrade implants, I'm sure they are great at getting you back on track. I'm just saying people have different paths and for people like me which they got trough 3 surgeries, it may be trickier. The mental impact on penile surgery doesn't have enough space in here and I'm sure many here suffered from a kind of post traumatic syndrome after getting operated twice, three times and so on. Thus, traveling and taking planes for getting surgeries abroad gets you sick as well. Planning for having at least 3 replacements is also something that would need more attention, but I understand most of the people going for an implant are more than 50..

The surgery I had in 2014, going back and forth for a dozen of times..it really messed me up. This combined to the overall worsening of my condition took me to the point I could not do nothing more than laying in my bed. There are many guys in here I do believe they are getting trough this..kusher is the first I can recall for instance. If I have never had surgery, my life it would be sexless the same, sad, but infinitely better. Being sad and doing things is far better than laying in a bed in pain or in mental disorder. That's something people in here underestimate. Doing surgery made me lost for years what your therapist said, having alternative sex or foreplays or whatever you want to call it. Can you believe I've enjoyed being masturbated for the first time in 8 years a week ago?!? I'm 30. Of course I'm not happy, I won't. Am I depressed? I am. But now I'm living abroad, I'm back on studies, I feel kind of whole again. It's a far cry compared to what I got till the last year.

I think we should educate people on the mental reflex of having penile surgeries, especially when you got side effects which is pretty common.

[Bud luck]

I actually have respect for men that have an implant, because I think is a very tough decision. Me personally, I'm going to wait until I decide to do the implant, I'm not mentally prepared for it yet

[Hawk]

...many people in here tend to underestimate the impact of an implant. That's must be a reason if often doctors and therefore literature suggest a post-operative supportive therapy. .. but I understand most of the people going for an implant are more than 50...

I need to correct some misinformation here, at least some false impressions.  
FACTS:
1. Most men on this forum who got implants were NOT over 50
2. Non of them required one minute of post-surgical counseling or therapy.  100% of them felt the implant did for them what counseling could never do.  They felt like new men psychologically.

It should be obvious to any thinker that the men best prepared to estimate the impact of an implant are those who have actually experienced an implant, not the men trying to imagine one.

Finally, I have had about 40 men voice to me in private what I am going to say.  Do not mistake my bluntness as anger or argumentative.  It is the plain every-day language men deserve to hear. It is honest conversation of men talking to men.

Every 50+ year-old man here knows exactly what it is like to be 20.  They lived it, and it is as vivid in their mind as last week is vivid in their minds.  We know how we felt sexually then and now.  We can envision how penis problems would have affected us then, AND many of us had Peyronies Disease in our 20's so it takes no imagination.

No man in his 20's can even pretend to imagine what sex is like to a man over 50.  Unlike men in their 50's they NEVER experienced it. The common view of a 20-year-old is that a guy in his 50's can take sex or leave it, is happy with sex once a week, never masturbates, is not obsessed with sex, and does not have a sexual thought flash across his mind about every several seconds of the day.  The reason they think that IS PRECISELY BECAUSE THEY ARE IGNORANT.[/u]

SO, enough of people who have never walked the walk pretending to know what it is like.  It is as dumb as me saying what I would have done if I was a Jew in Nazi Germany, or I know exactly how it felt for pioneer women to bury their babies along the trail migrating west.  Frankly, It is so dumb it is embarrassing.  To anyone who thinks it isn't, it is only proof of your own immaturity.  You will look back in the blink of an eye when you are there and realize how ridiculous your statements sounded.

[Jack1909]

Well there is no talking with you Hawk, I'm sorry because I do understand most of the things you say but you don't even try to get closer to any of mine, which are reasonable

[Hawk]

Jack,

It has never been my goal to try to get closer to another person's opinion.  It is my goal to get closer to the truth.  I have no vested interest in any set of opinions but allow the facts to fall where they will without discrimination.  I have altered my opinions many times as new evidence is presented.

Embracing your opinions is not a matter of fairness or unfairness.  It is not a matter of being nice or not nice.  It is a matter of evaluating the evidence.  Rather than present one piece of evidence that I can evaluate you seem to turn to a position of how you "feel" about the matter.

I presented several clear facts.  If you disagree with them then you either can show evidence that these facts are wrong or you have to conclude that in spite of the facts, you choose to embrace your opinions.

[Jack1909]

You don't have the truth in your pocket Hawk, implant surgeons don't have themselves and most of them may be less extreme than you when it comes to implant talking. I would run away from any surgeon talking like this. Really. Luckily there are surgeons which are not like you out there. Can I bring your surgeon up, Eid, which really understands that for a guy already getting multiple surgery is a big thing planning of having at least 3 more. Maybe because he has felt throughout his career how much people can be impaired from previous surgeries. And what about a person dealing with chronic pain, that's would be a patient needing an extra evaluation and maybe a different one? Sometimes it looks like people are kind of a production line to you..and that's wrong. We are all happy implant gave your life back but other members have to deal with extra consideration as they got trough extra things. Medicine is not the Bible and you talking about implants like preachers do.  

[Hawk]

Sorry, Jack.  I have no idea what you are trying to say.  I am unable to follow your comments.  You have yet to state what you even disagree with.

If you disagree with one thing I posted, simply list the incorrect statement and post the evidence to support a different conclusion.  That way, we can weigh the evidence and see if a different conclusion is in order.  That is how we arrive at truth and how we all learn, not by posting opinionated personal remarks against someone.  I admit I don't have truth in my pocket.  That is why I function off of facts.  So we can find the truth.

Do you somehow think I am telling you to have another surgery??  If so, nothing could be further from the truth.  No one should have surgery if they are against it.