PEYRONIE'S & SEX related

[james1947]

ferenfar

I read all your posts and I have first of all to reinforce all what BentYoung and voulezvous have written to you.
I will quote two sentenses:

If you think about it, women do have children and vaginas are designed to accommodate many shapes and sizes without much discomfort, within reason.

&

They never ridiculed or complained & I have learned that women care much less about our penises than we think they do.

In my opinion you will not have an answer if you will not try it.

I also think (I may be wrong) that the ED you have is because your anxiety for what will be and how will be.
Maybe you don't know, but many man have different problems than Peyronie's that affecting they partners enjoying sexual activity with penetration like premature ejaculation & ED so your bellow to statements are really wrong:

My reasoning has usually went along the line that I am somehow "broken" and that it is very hard for me to compete against males who have normal sexual organs

&

How is a weirdo like me going to compete against an army of normal men who can offer them this just like that?

I don't know where you are living now but you have to see an uro specialised in male disfunction problems to asses your physical situation.
Myself I am from Romania and I agree with your statement that in Eastern Europe difficult to find a good specialist in the subject, but you need an assessment to understand your options.
I would like to add also that have the Nesbit surgery or Modified Nesbit surgery that are relative simple to correct congenital curvature.

Read the boards regarding congenital curvature and surgeries. It will help you to understand better what are your options and what others in your condition have done.

Don't give up

James

[voulezvous]

ferenfar,

I respect your comment about our age differences & the pressure which, as a single young man in this era of fairly open sex, can be incredibly challenging. But I must comment that you are suggesting that women in their 20's are fundamentally different than women in their 40's & up. I don't believe that's true. If it is, then you are dealing with immature ladies & you are better off without them. Ask yourself who/what you really want in a relationship. If its its that you want to add a lot of hits to your scorecard, then, yes, you will be graded on performance only. There are challenges to a sexual relationship at any age, as you will find out as you grow older. I stand by what I have written & ask you to do what I & others here have suggested. Be slow in revealing private things about yourself &, above all, be honest. Believe that you have nothing to be ashamed about.

[Luciano]

In my opinion you will not have an answer if you will not try it.

Very well said!
2 Years ago I met a woman (20 years younger than me) we were pretty much attracted to each other, and one evening it was obvious (under normal conditions) we were going to have sex, I told her it was going to be difficult because of my Peyronies Disease.
she answered exactly what James said. "Your not going to know unless you try".
So we did try.. In my opinion it was not the most glorious night of my life, but I managed with some difficulty.
The funny thing was afterwards. when she told me that she thought it was my routine to get women into bed by telling them I had Peyronies Disease to make them curious. *LOL*
We were together for one and a half years.
She is leaving me now, for completely different reasons.. But thats ok. I had a wonderfull time.
Bottom Line:
Go for it, even if you think it wont work out! At your age, dont make it a challenge for you, make it a challenge for them!
Luc

[ferenfar]

Thank you all for your participation, I'm really glad to see that this thread is getting a lot more attention. Going to try to cover everything discussed up to this point in a rather large post.

Overall, I would like to thank you for your optimistic posts, it is encouraging to hear that there are chances of this working out. If the relationship gets to that point, be assured that I will try, I won't back off. Now it's just a question of how to do it properly (and maybe whether one failure implies that its going to be the same for all other cases).

Now. I'll address each post one by one.

--------------------------------------
BentYoung - I strongly agree with you about maintaining good communication with the partner. I didn't even consider anything else. When you have this condition you kind of feel you need to explain yourself. My stand will be along the line of:
if  pleasurable
 good
else
 try some other way(s)
 if still doesn't work
   tell her she's free to do whatever. I do not want to constrain her in any way from being happy.

Thanks for the tips on positions. Since my curvature is downwards I guess I'll go for the reverse and try doggie or something similar for an optimal experience.

The lack of any remote possbility of having a night stand is bad. I think they are hazardous so wouldn't be a big fan anyway, but it gets annoying because everybody can do it, but you can't. You have no choice, you need to take the slow route without any guarantees that it's going to work out.

--------------------------------------
voulezvous - This talk brings me to the next point, which relates to your second post. I'm glad you see what I mean. But I would question whether it is really immaturity on the part of a girl to seek out a very satisfying sexual relationship and make this a requirement. I would argue that scoring is bad because it is risky. Given a situation in which you are not interested in producing offspring, what would be the purpose of a long term stable relationship? I wouldn't think that it's because you need a really close friend. You could always talk to your really close buddies, or your sister/brother, or your mom. Isn't one of the main reasons that you desire constant sex with a person that you can trust (not stds, unlikely to screw you over in any way imaginable etc.). Your partner is  friend, but one which you happen to have sex on a regular basis.

What I'm getting to is that I cannot find any objection to a girl's behaviour of giving up the relationship because the sex would be better with someone else.

I am in no position of doing any comparison between age groups of women and I'm not implying that you are having any easy one. I think all of you people getting sex at 60+ in spite of various problems are really cool, I am such a loser that I can't even do it at 20 something.

------------------------------------

Luciano - i'm glad to hear it worked well for you. May I ask what is your curvature(direction, angle)?


------------------------------------

James - I'm not giving up about my first attempt. I might lay low for a while if it goes really bad because of this and look into the solutions you suggested. I know about the surgery, but I also know about the fact that it works by shortening your penis (and by reading testimonies on this forum, those doctors lie their asses off and what they call 1 - 2 cm ends up being 4-5 cm). nonetheless, I'll do go for a check with those doctors in the wild west, since there's no way I'm getting close to those in crazy east (Europe that is).

Thanks for reading my posts and for your optimistic points. I hope you don't mind, I did some background checks on you and read your "introduce yourself post". That's quite some story (I don't mean that in a mocking way at all). It kind of contrasts though with nicey nice stories about good and respectable women being understanding. It proves they do have breaking point and kind of sustains previous points which i made in the discussion with voulezvous.

------------------------------------

[Luciano]

Luciano - i'm glad to hear it worked well for you. May I ask what is your curvature(direction, angle)?

Well I have peyronies (aquired penis induration) you seem to have congenital curvature. (one of the symtoms I was told, is curvature downwards) Advantage is, surgery is easier with congenital curvature as there generally is no change in condition.
My curvature is about 47 degrees -> upward and 30 degrees left. I also have severe hourglassing from mid of shaft to under the glans.

Luc

[ferenfar]

It would be great if more people could share some experiences/advice on the topic at hand.

Everybody up until this point shared relatively optimistic points. Wouldn't mind to hear about things that did not go to well, just to take note.

Would be cool to hear some feedback from a female member.

[ferenfar]

Bump. Anyone care to share any more advice or experiences? Any help is kindly appreciated.

[ferenfar]

tl;dr
Based on successful sexual experiences I have decided to give up on pursuing any kind of surgery/method for treating my 50 deg downward congenital curve. I believe my situation is a good argument for seriously reconsidering surgical methods of correction and I strongly argue for experimenting before deciding to irreversibly alter your penis, even in the case of a non-negligible curve. Furthermore, one should give serious thought on his own and question a doctor's diagnosis by using logic and common sense in order to make the best decision for himself.

*Expanded*
I was supposed to undergo a Nesbit procedure for correcting a 50 degree downward penile curvature this spring. This was about to happen right before my departure to the us for work related purposes for 6 months. The doctor had told me that "it is impossible for you to have sex given your curvature" (not an  exact quote, but he used the word "impossible") and insisted on the fact that I NEED the surgery.

At pre-surgical examination, I was advised by a nicest nurse that I have ever met that it's a bad idea, since while being in the US I might get complications like infections and I will not be able to have sex during my stay there. At that time I thought, based on what the good ol' doc said, that I just thought  I can't have sex, so I thought "yeah right, sex" but somehow what she said felt like the right thing to do. I officially postponed the surgery for October.

During my stay there, I met someone nice and I said "what the heck, maybe that doc was wrong". And, indeed, he was wrong. It wasn't a proper relationship, but more about casual sex. However, she was very understanding and helped me overcome my strong anxieties about my penis and my body overall. According to her, the sex was not painful, but actually very pleasurable. She was orgasming frequently so I guess she meant it. She said she didn't even notice until I told her. We did doggystyle - style positions as well as frontal penetration positions. Doggy seemed to be the most comfortable for me, I still find frontal ones a bit tricky and sometimes uncomfortable and I need to adjust the angle. Overall, nothing close to "impossible". May I remind you I have a significant curvature in terms of angle.

Based on this experience I have no thoughts of undergoing surgery anymore. I am quite content with my state, I have overcome many of my anxieties and I believe that I am avoiding many risks by making this choice.

My personal conclusions are that I have done the wrong thing for all this time by avoiding sexual relationships based on fallacious assumptions about my ability to have satisfying sex for both me and my partner.

My advice to people who possess a congenital curve is to experiment before committing to treatments of any kind and give serious thought to thing such as surgery in terms of possible gains and possible risks.

It's October. Now there is someone that I need to find and give a bouquet of flowers and the most sincere thanks and someone that I need to give a punch in the face and a kick in the balls. I think I'll stick to the flowers and thanks because I don't want to visit the big house any time soon.

[Old Man]

fenefar:

HIP, HIP,HOORAY! Vote one for colonies, huh?? The nurse steered you right!!!

Old Man

[jackp]

fendfar

That nurse is one great lady. A bouquet of roses for her.

You have found the sex position the doctors at Vanderbilt recommend for men with peyronies. For missionary put the girls butt on a pillow,this changes the angle and allows for better penetration and movement, without slipping out. Sex with a rigid penis and a good lubricant is a must to prevent new injury.



Jackp
http://jackp-penileimplant.blogspot.com