Missing sex, and my old normal life

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diehardpatriot

I still like my life besides my sex life. But today more than usual I thought about how much I miss sex and masturbation. It's been about 6 months since the last time I've had sex. And 5 weeks since I masturbated.. still no signs of improvement. I miss the days where I could have sex and that was just apart of my day. I wouldn't think about it after, I would just carry on and go to sleep worry free.  Now when I get hory I sit there and stomach it and ignore and fight the urges. I miss being intimate with my beautiful girlfriend. Now if I were to ejaculate I'd spend the rest of the day blaming myself for being such an idiot and would have major anxiety. This can't be life. This isn't how life is supposed to be. Like is beautiful, it's not about pain or suffering, this can't be it. I refuse to be complacent with this stupid condition. I am not complacent living like this. I have to for the time being. But my patience is running thin. It's looking like a surgery is in my future and I'm accepting that. As long as I can relieve my sexual urgeS without major anxiety or pain afterwards. Sex and masturabtion is supposed to be validating, and a stress reliever, now I am scared of sex and mastirbation. An 18 year old, scared to have sex or masturbate. This rant is here not for anyone's pity. I just felt like posting it. It's theraputic for me I guess. One day I can look back at this and know how strong I am to make it through this. The mental and physical toughness I possess. One day. Until then I'll comtinue to distract myself by doing well at school and work and keeping myself busy. And keep on holding on to hope that one day things will be better
Penis injury in late 2017. A lump formed at injury site that caused no deformity, just pain and a palpable lump. Pain is improving through proper rest and use, diet, and mindfulness. I am always learning and looking to share things that have helped.

Hontas

Its all about respecting and giving value to yourself, i know it hurts physically and it doesnt feel good to have sex at all.  

Hawk

Hontas,

Thank you for that post.  It was full of wisdom!
Prostatectomy 2004, radiation 2009, currently 70 yrs old
After pills, injections, VED - Dr Eid, Titan 22cm implant 8/7/18
Hawk - Updated 10/27/18 - Peyronies Society Forums

damned

You're not alone. There are others your age who are forced to be abstinent. I feel your pain brother. :(

Wilson

Hardpatriot, What Mr Goldstein says about your case, in general? According to your posts, you quite often visited him before. So, what he says related to your condition and is he able to solve your problem? When you was last been at his office?  
Young and regularly thinking about this issue
Peyronie's without curvature since April 2012 due to injury
Almost constant discomfort and Loss of penile sensation
Still fighting - trying to find a top famous specialist

diehardpatriot

Wilson , I wouldn't recommend Goldstein honestly. There are better doctors for peyronies than him. If you're looking to get xiaflex injections or other injection he could be good, other than that I recommend you find someone else. Dr lue is in california too (San Fran) and he is much more experienced in peyronies .  
Penis injury in late 2017. A lump formed at injury site that caused no deformity, just pain and a palpable lump. Pain is improving through proper rest and use, diet, and mindfulness. I am always learning and looking to share things that have helped.

Wilson

Hi Hardpatriot, yes I know that Goldstein is not a peyronie specialist as I talked with him during the international telephone's consultation in this Winter. It's really confuse to read a happy peyronie reviews in "Healthgrades" (medical website) related to Goldstein. So, it's - weird. Regarding T. Lue, I had a bad experience with him during video visit recently as he became too old, unhelpful and just wasted my money. You can read about my full video experience with T Lue and my travel in Serbia in this link: https://www.peyroniesforum.net/index.php/topic,15488.0.html  
Sincerely.
Young and regularly thinking about this issue
Peyronie's without curvature since April 2012 due to injury
Almost constant discomfort and Loss of penile sensation
Still fighting - trying to find a top famous specialist