First time here

[elsemarie]

Hi, so relieved I found you all.
I am 66 years old. My husband and I have been married 40 years, and living with Peyronies for a few years now. Before that we had a amazing fun-filled sex-life and plenty of intimacy.
Long story short, he says I caused/triggered/contributed to the Peyronies by pulling too hard on his penis (which I don't recall but of course it is possible I did so.). I think he saw his GP once, and then we were on our own. The acute stage partially resolved but then he had a heart attack and was put on meds for that. Then it was bent penis and ED. He insisted we try Viagra and Cialis. which made him sick, and actually didn't do much in terms of being erect enough for intercourse. I was also terrified of the side effects of the Cialis, how his penis looked so angry and desperate, and how it made my DH feel awful after. So we stopped that. Last time we had any kind of sex was August 2015. We just... gave up. And never mentioned it again. I was okay with this for a while, because seeing him struggle to maintain an erection was so sad.
But lately I realized we have lost all intimacy, including non-sexual. And I am very young and healthy for me age - I would love to have some real sex, even a cuddle now and then. I also carry guilt and shame that I was the cause. Only the last few days did we start talking, after I had a series of complete meltdowns. I became convinced he must be getting his emotional needs met elsewhere. So, a huge mess all round.
Noy sure wehat is next. Maybe this group can help.

[Stabler]

Hello Elsemarie,

Welcome to the forum. I hope we can be of some assistance to you and your husband. I have sent you a PM woth some helpful links within the forum, please have a look at those.

Can you tell us has your husband seen a specialist that diagnosed him with Peyronies and did he try any other treatments other than the Cialis? It us one nd of.sounds.like he only saw a regular practitioner which would not direct you with proper treatment options

The more information you can give is the more we will know how to help.

Stabler67

[Norm]

Elsemarie,
Most doctors know Peyronies Disease as a name in a textbook or the occasional periodical.  If they haven't experienced it or treated it, they won't be much help. You need to, at least, get him to go to a urologist who knows more about it and knows it is a real medical concern. There is help. Stay in touch with this forum. There are treatments. Surgery is not the last resort at your mans age. Check into it. Read all you can here. There is a wealth of info if ou spend the time.
Norm

[james1947]

If you have a good insurance, maybe you will want your husband to go bionic  
I mean an implant.
Proposing you to read about the subject here:
FT

James

[katy]

Elsie, please contact me if you want to talk.

- Katy

[Kaye]

Elsemarie,

Thank you for speaking up. You've given me the courage to speak up, too. I've been reading here for a little while, but I haven't posted anything.

I'm 63 years old. My 51-year-old boyfriend of 7 years has Peyronies. We are in a committed relationship.

His Peyronies was diagnosed a few months ago by a nurse practitioner at the Cleveland Clinic. He nearly cancelled that appointment, and he doesn't want to see the specialist that she referred him to. His feeling is that he's aging and accepting of the changes in his body as he ages, and he doesn't want to pursue medical options further. Fortunately, we are able to have intercourse, but he's much less interested in sex than he used to be, and sex seems to be less pleasurable for him. Our non-sexual intimacy has suffered, too. He told me after the fact that he was depressed about the changes in his body over the last year but that he's accepting now. He didn't share any of his feelings of depression as he was experiencing them. To me, it felt like he was distant, and I attributed that more to other things going on in his life.

He has said he doesn't want to spend any more money on doctors, so I offered to pay for him to see the specialist. I'm hoping he'll take me up on that after the holidays, but I'm not sure he will. Getting him to try any kind of treatment will likely be even tougher.

Anyway, Elsemarie, I appreciated hearing from someone who is experiencing something similar to what I'm experiencing. Thanks again for your courage and for giving me the courage to speak.

Kaye

[TonySa]

Welcome Kaye, your bf is very fortunate to have such a supportive partner.

[Jonbinspain]

Kaye;

I understand that we're all different with different outlooks on things, etc. I suffered with this horrible disease for 4 years before undergoing surgery at the age of 65. I wasn't prepared to give up on my sex life and just say 'oh well, I'm old'. You're as old as you think you are!

2 years later it's the best thing I did.