depression

[edzo67]

i have at no time cared less about life, as i do now. finding it increasingly harder to find reasons to not just give up on living.
it seems apparent that its not a question of if, but more of a question of when. how much longer can i take this downward spiral of my life. i find it difficult to harm myself. perhaps i will pass on of a broken heart if self medicating doesnt get me first

[nemo]

You are not alone in this - many here have walked this same path, only to find a brighter day ahead. If your Peyronies Disease is truly the singular source of your depression, don't assume that there can be no improvement. There are options to explore up to and including an inflatable implant, which recipients claim is better than sliced bread.  

Don't give in to worst case scenario thinking. Somewhere today, right now, someone is sitting across the table from a doctor who is telling them they have 3-months to live. Or worse, that their child has three months. In that light, we are the lucky ones. We can fight this thing with everything at our disposal, and we should.

Best,
Nemo

[TheE]

I feel you man, I have had depression for years before this came about, my method is to take my mind off sex for a while and appreciate everything else life has to offer.

Hang in there, don't just wish for a brighter day, try to think positive now.

[Pfract]

I also had the same thoughts during a long time after i fractured my penis, and sometimes i do feel extremely sad. I do try to get my head away from this as much as possible and try to think that I am saving money to go to what I think is the Best doctor for my case, Who might be able to help me. I also try to think like it was said here, that there are solutions if worst comes to worst, even though we might not like them.

There are also more options than in the past regarding this disease and e.d, so one as got to have hope.  

We are all more or less on the same boat. If you need support, come to the forum and vent off and ask for help. Don't give up!

[NeoV]

We can all relate. Your not alone man. I am quite sure you will find a new way to think about this, to make things feel good for you again in your life. I've been getting closer and the root causes of my frustration is getting more clear. I highly recommend mindfulness meditation. Being present regardless of your pain. I'm sure there is an answer.

I read an interesting article in a Buddhist magazine my mom has, talking about sickness and living with it, and still being "okay." I am not Buddhist but the philosophical aspect can be useful. Some of the things I read were actually quite helpful. Two famous Buddhists who died from cancer had different stances when faced with it, I think somewhat recently. One said she was not sick at all, even before she died. She said "I am not sick." Another told his students or some people "I am cancer." As in some kind of total acceptance. That may make no sense at all, and can't do the article justice. I just mean to tell you there are odd and creative models of thinking that can get you through this. You can choose to accept it and feel happiness again, even if for no damn reason other than being bored of your depression. Usually it takes hitting rock bottom to get to that point unfortunately.

As far as finding love, Peyronie's can't stop you hah! Not at all. Having satisfying sex, that is harder since your brain is telling you that somehow it isn't good enough with Peyronie's. But even without, was it ever good enough? Learning to be satisfied with less is a huge thing in life, not just for yourself but for others. Does your partner really care if you're satisfied or not? She just wants you to be happy.

Your attitude and your happiness are not about you anymore, it's about others.

We are here for you man. Stay with us and lets feel good again.

[Jimbruski]

Yes, by all means, "hang in there".  I too was diagnosed with major depression up to and including a suicide attempt.  FORTUNATELY my attempt failed.  I was able to hook up with a great psychologist and psychiatrist and with medication I am getting along nicely and enjoying life.  I never hesitate to share my experience if it will help someone suffering this crippling disease.  About a year ago I experienced ED and Peyronie's disease and it was devastating.  But having a great support group with which I trust being able to talk about these types of things I've been able to face the ED and peyronies head on, (not a pun).  
The forum members in this thread have been your support group in a sense.  I hope you are still reading this thread and gain a sense of hope from this post.  When you get down, TALK with someone you genuinely trust.

[popopo]

Jimbruski,
I admire your strenght for being able to carry on, but I just can't see how. The only way I know how to deal with this is focusing on other things in life, but really accepting it doesn't seem to work. Whenever I talk to a therapist he/she allways seems to make me mad instead. They will say stuff like: "did you know women don't even like big penises?" and "It's just silly to judge your manliness on penis size" but in all reality I just don't buy it. I know how it is and the alternative is not pretty.. The only thing that keeps me going is actual hate! The thought of submitting to this problem makes me so mad that I feel like I need to continue living so I can one day turn it around. I allready dream of the first day I'll get my new functioning penis, but until then I'm a mess. How do you cope with that? Is it good to motivate myself with the thought that one day I'll be a better man, or should I try and be the man I want to be with all the risks involved (getting rejected by girls over and over again for example or finding that one girl who sleeps with me but never calls back or straight up tells me that my dick doesn't work. I actually even had this happen to me before with a hooker! I live in Amsterdam so prostitution is legal here before anyone judges me, but the girl literally told me: "you look good, but your dick's not working."

[Old Man]

popopo:

Please read my last PM sent to you today. There is much good information for some of your problems contained in it. I will delete this post in three days.

Old Man

[Jimbruski]

Popopo,

Your anger might just pull you through.  It wasn't until I realized that FEAR controlled my life, and I decided to get pissed at FEAR that I began to make progress.  As long as your anger is focused toward a feeling about yourself and you decide to declare war on it, I think you'll make progress.

Women may be reacting because you show your discomfort with yourself outwardly.  In other words they don't see a confident person.  This turns them off.  Forget what some hooker said.  You must declare war on your life and vow to win the battle and make yourself better, healthier, and more attractive.  You do this by changing your thinking from can't to can.  I did this and I know you can but it won't happen without hard work on your part.  Stop letting the size or shape of your penis DEFINE you.  I have Peyronnies and haven't made love to a women in 5 years because I physically can't.  But that will not stop me from conquering this disease and otherwise enjoying my life.

Next, you need a support group.  A good friend that you can talk honestly with and who will shoot square with you?  You absolutely need some support getting through this.  I'll offer all my support by PM if you'd like.

Let me know your feelings about this and get to work on being a better person one day at a time.

Jimbruski