Last gasp cry for help. I think I'm done for.

[Justinian]

[I went to the emergency room yesterday because, for the past 5 days, there has been a constant ache emanating from my penis (largely the left side). It even hurts to walk. There is a constant (and sometimes sharp) ache at all times. My penis has never felt like this before - cascading a bizarre lurching sensation of pain I've never felt in my life. It's terrifying.

I'm absolutely devastated. I'm back in the acute phase, it looks like. I don't even remember anything like this when I first got Peyronie's when I was 18. The emergency doc expedited a meeting for me with my urologist. I'll see him in the next 2 days. Unfortunately he's the same guy who told me viagra was the only thing he could do for me back when I saw him last year. I don't expect much.

And so, I turn to you men - what can I try to do to stop this wretched disease? I'm in tears as I write this. My penis was already pretty much ruined for 5 years, and I haven't had a real erection since I was 18 (see my post history for my full story if you want). Now my penis is just emanating pain and surely my Peyronie's is about to get worse -- unless?? It's as if I can feel a new plaque starting to begin under my skin. I will try ANYTHING. ANYTHING! Please let me know, guys. I'm counting on you. If I don't manage to stop this now, my penis may be completely ruined forever. And any last unlikely chance of a normal sex life gone with it.

It's my birthday today. My friends and family are waiting for me when I get home from work. Meanwhile I'm in tears and sobbing like a baby. This world is too cruel.


Yours,
Justinian

[Knight]

I'm very sorry to read about your current situation but I can assure you, you are not alone. I have almost constant irritation 24/7 as well and there are times it pushes me near to my limits. But we must continue to fight, we cannot give up hope.

There are many others who have gone before us and found solutions for this evil disease. There is an answer out there for all of us, we just need to find it. My first advice would be to find a different, better educated doctor who is willing to be more aggressive. They are out there and they can help us. Everyday this disease is brought more into public awareness and the better for all of us. Even though the solutions will most likely be driven by potential profits there will be solutions.

Hang in there!

One day at a time!

[dplookin]

Justinian.........have you tried using DMSO with Aloe ?  It's in a Gel form, and a lot of people use it for Pain.  I am using it which I bought on Amazon.com.  Maybe it will help with the pain.  dplookin

[james1947]

Justinian

First of all happy birthday. I know you don't feel as you want to celebrate, but don't forget you are just 24 and will have many really happy birthdays in the future.
Regarding the pain, I was advising Pentox and CoQ10 as they helped many on this forum.

James

[pintor]

Justinian, Check out the recent posts regarding Xiaflex.  This stuff is really working for me and several others, and my insurance covered it.  Good luck, Pintor

[NeoV]

Man, I'm so sorry to hear this.

How long has your acute phase been? Mine lasted almost two years.

[emasculated]

Justinian, I can only give some practical advice. It's not necessarily the end of the world to have a "ruined penis" as you put it. I for myself have simply concluded that I need some out of the box thinking for the situation and do the best with what I got. I decided that I will never have a relationship with a woman again and came to terms with this thought. I also realized that I will never be truly happy again as a man. But that is natural with such a disease and normal. So I try my best with thinking outside the box so to speak. I have found several avenues to get my sexual fix. For one thing I regularly go to a erotic massage girl which helps tremendously. I always go to a different one for variety. She gets naked and I explore and touch her body (it's called body 2 body massage), then I get a massage. ED or whatever, whether you can come or not does not matter there. I feel much relieved afterwards and can better concentrate etc.. Second thing is I chat online at a sex site with a lot of hot girls and via skype watch them get naked (I do not have to pay for this, it's a site for anyone). Then I also go regularly to a sauna spa where there is total no clothes rule. Men and women are mixed. So there I can just lie in the brine(?) bath and watch the naked girls walk around and take a shower with them. Which serves the fantasy part of sexuality. So my sex needs are taken care of despite all of this evil monster called Peyronies. I realized I don't need a woman in my life for several reasons I don't want to outline.  

[NeoV]

I firmly disagree that you even need a penis at all to find a woman to love you. I could please a girl sexually without it and I know plenty of beautiful girls here who would stay with me and only me even if my penis was gone.  

[emasculated]

Neo.. I sincerly doubt it to be honest. I think the women's room being private has among others the reason that women are pretty glad they don't have a guy with Peyronies Disease and if they do they are pretty glad they are not married to him so they can leave and if they are married to him they are pretty sad and look for options to leave. But if that belief helps you why not.

[NeoV]

It's not a belief, it's a fact and a part of my life daily. My ex was beyond super model attractive and I know she would almost rather not have to deal with a penis at all. Beautiful women are tired of the pressure. I think a girl may adore you for your malady but you have to get out there and try. I have a handful of girls my age who ask me out constantly here, none of them care if I can use my penis or not, in fact they all just want to hug and be loved.

I told a few of my current/recent partners about it and actually showed them. You don't realize how much women love and adore men. I told one girl about it years back and she grabbed my hands and said "you don't get it, women love men so much". It's not about our dicks.

Men evolved to have sex in groups, many men with one girl, watching each other perform intensely. The sport of sex, the visuals, and the concept of the penis as a competitive symbol is our battle. In our brain, the "worst" penis equals genetic death. We carry this weight with us everywhere we go, but it's illusory.

Sadly most of us here will never figure this out in our lifetimes. And if there is one thing a woman will never forgive you for, it's for being selfish enough to never let it go.
You're not only giving up on yourself, but your letting down the women who need you emotionally, and yes, sexually, by renouncing women and relationships.

Personally, I'm enjoying my sex life very much, more than pre-Peyronie's to be accurate. For the first time in my life, I am walking up to the most beautiful women and making things happen. I can't even believe what I've been doing, but it works, and they end up wanting me long term, and wanting me sexually. You guys can do this, I know you can. Life has reached a point where my own trauma has become irrelevant.

Health is an illusion, life is death, it's never pretty at the core of it, so start movin'

-V

[LWillisjr]

I think the women's room being private has among others the reason that women are pretty glad they don't have a guy with Peyronies Disease and if they do they are pretty glad they are not married to him so they can leave and if they are married to him they are pretty sad and look for options to leave. But if that belief helps you why not.

emasculated,
Wrong, wrong, wrong! I can't disagree with you more. Women want so much more out of relationship than just sex. Is physical contact important... yes. But women need more than that and I agree with NeoV that you can make a woman happy. Women want to HELP their partners who have Payronies disease, and no they are not wishing they can find a way to leave them and run. I feel sorry that you have this view of women in general and I trust that you can find one who loves you for you.

[welshwales]

NeoV, you certainly have the right of it. Most women don't give a %!#? about what your penis is like. Penetration is not the be-all and end-all of sex. The best selling women's sex toys are little bullet vibes which stimulate the clitoris only. There isn't much direct clitoral stimulation in penetrative sex, and it is a fallacy that it should be the focus of sexual activity. I can do way more interesting stuff with my fingers and tongue than is possible with a penis. Your cock is not the true symbol of masculinity. How you treat people and interact with them is what defines you as a man.

[UrsusMinor]

Wow, Emasculated. At the risk of seeming obnoxious, you don't sound as if you have much experience with women.

[james1947]

Unfortunately I have to agree with both NeoV and Emasculated, from my own experience.
As Hawk has ones said:

Some shallow female never built a woman to go along with her vagina.

Others are wonderful.
I don't want to post % of how many in each group, but more or less equal.
From the other side (also Hawk):

You are not offering a woman a dick that just happens to have a tolerable life support system attached to it

James

[emasculated]

exhibit a
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cVGe5ty1Ad8

[james1947]

You can't really see where they eyes are concentrated.
If it was real and not a makeup, those woman were applying to the court.
Just my opinion.
From the other side, woman have eyes, same as we have and like a nice view.

James

[C_lab34]

That video is just silly. I don't think you should let something like that bring you down or convince you that you'll never be attractive to a woman. I seriously doubt a relationship has ever been built on the foundation of a bulge. You could "catch" lots of guys checking out big busts all day long, does that mean a flat chested girl should despair of ever finding love? They often do, but they shouldn't because a person is much more than an isolated body part. Don't let a primitive evolutionary directive combined with crass culture destroy your spirit.  This is just cynical.  

[james1947]

100% right C_lab
I think Hawk two sentences I have posted are concluding the subject very well.

James

[Thisismyusername]

Justinian,

The pain I had at the beginning of peyronie's disease sounds a lot like what you are going through now.  Unfortunately I don't have any advice for treatment of pain in your stage.  I would suggest, though, that you avoid all sexual activity until your daily pain disappears.  And even after the pain stops I would give it a long time to make sure things have stabilized in a pain free state before resuming sex or masturbation.  I would also suggest being very gentle when doing both.  

I know that in the beginning I did not want to stop having sex because of the pain and I am certain that this made my condition worse.  In my case it took about a year for the pain to stop on a daily basis.  I still have pain on erection.  There is probably a good chance that you will have a better outcome than me though.  

My last piece of advice is to try not to think too negatively and try to take time to relax and make sure that you are not getting too stressed about things.  That is easier said than done, but I know that when this happened to me I completely freaked out and spent months in constant distress.  As a result I developed a muscle tension disorder in my pelvis that I am still dealing over a year later.  This would have been completely avoidable if I had found a better way of dealing with things than freaking out and getting extremely anxious.  

I wish you the best luck.  I'm sorry that you are dealing with this.  It's a tough life but there is always hope.  Even if our penises never recover, remember that humans are good at adapting.  It just takes a lot of time and a perspective shift.  Try to remember the good parts about life.  

[TT08]

Hey Justinian, I can almost relate to what you are going through, I am 26 and I have had peyronies for 2 years but before that I had a congenial curve until I was 19 when I had a nesbit procedure to straighten my penis, I also dribble urine after urinating which is extremely embarrassing.

Anyway, now being back to square one I haven't even looked at a girl for 2 years such was my embarrassment and I developed severe anxiety to the point where I couldn't get a job for almost all of these 2 years. HOWEVER, I have spent a lot of time focussing and trying to improve every other area of my life. I have developed goals and now what gets me through this and keeps me happy is knowing what I want to do with my life and that I am working towards it. I am ready to date again because even if I can't please a girl with my penis, I have taught myself to be confident enough to share my affliction (The worst that could happen is she leaves and you find someone else).

This keeps me positive which is HUGE when it comes to fighting peyronies and that is where I believe you win your first battle. Right now I am in the process of reading a lot on this forum and other places and I have read loads of positive stories from guys on here. Whether it's through time or the right combination of treatments this thing can be cured. Don't ever believe otherwise.  

[cs65]

Only thing that helps with my pain is Lyrica (100mg 2x per day) + Clonazepam 0.5mg (once per day).  Does not cure anything, but does help me tremendously with my penis pain.