don't think I can do this anymore

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stopthismadness

I've just about had enough of everything, most days I don't want to wake up or get out of bed anymore. Everything just seems so hopeless. Pentox hasn't done much, Cialis is starting to not work, my erections are getting worse. My mind is just completely destroyed by this.  I'm 26 now. It's been about 9 years and I feel like I'm trapped in a nightmare, I just want to feel like the old me again, if that person even exists anymore. I don't think I can go another 10 years like this. This disease has ruined my life completely, every facet of it has been affected not just my sex life. School , Work, just my thought process in general. I can't be positive , I can't feel happy. I have no drive. It's all fake if I try, this is always underneath. I feel like I have no future. The last girl I was with I couldn't even keep it up with cialis.. and she lost interest in me because this damn condition just makes me fall into deeper depression, I cared for her alot but how can I give myself to somebody and make them happy when I feel like this :(  I don't know what to do anymore really, I feel like all of my tears have been cried and I'm just doomed to this life of despair. My heart aches.

Skjaldborg

Hey Stopthismadness,

I hear you partner, this disease sucks. I got it at the relatively young age of 29 and I am now dealing with the break up of my marriage, my mom being diagnosed with Alzeimers and my career is going nowhere. It seems like life piles it on sometimes.

In your case, you've got to fight one battle at a time. First, I suggest going to a therapist. I did when I was first diagnosed and having someone to talk to was immensely helpful. A therapist can help you organize your thoughts while giving you a safe place to vent. Also, your insurance might cover some of the cost.

As for pentox, it works but it takes awhile. It takes several months for it to make changes to your red blood cells. Give it time. Also, erectile dysfunction may sometimes be psychological, rather than physiological for young, healthy men with Peyronies. I had this problem early on because I was self conscious of how my penis looked. An appointment with urologist Dr. Lue confirmed that my ED was temporary. If you are self conscious, all the cialis or Viagra in the world won't make you hard. Find a partner you are comfortable with and focus on sex that isn't entirely penis-oriented. It takes time and patience to learn acceptance.

Hang in there and PM me If you have questions. I can PM you my phone # if you need to talk. If I've learned anything from Peyronie's disease it's that I am a lot stronger than I thought I was. You'll learn that about yourself too.

Skjald

Edited per Jackp's advice.

Knight

Hang in there bro! You are not alone and you have some excellent support right here from what I can tell. One day at a time....praying for you buddy! Stay strong, don't let Peyronies Disease win!!!

jackp

Skjaidborg

I agree with 90% of your post. There is one thing I disagree with. Young men with peyronies and erectile disfunction.  In a majority of cases the erectile disfunction is not psychological but one of the complications of peyronies.

Jackp
http://jackp-penileimplant.blogspot.com

NeoV

I'm 26 now as well, and I feel the same thing most days. I can't smile, work, or go to classes without thinking about it for the most part.

Like you I just lost my girl just a month ago. She was all I ever cared about, I even proposed to her and she had accepted. She was flawless to me.  We still live together, but she stays out most nights and I don't want to imagine what she's doing. I feel physically sick, I think I may be getting some kind of brain damage from being around her and her insanity.

We will still be with a great girl, It will just be different than now, or just further in the future. What we have to do now is fight for everything else we can in our lives while we are this age.

Do everything you can to take the focus off your dick. Go for a jog, lift weights, give it a long rest. Stress makes this so much worse. Focus on your health and finance just try to let it go for now. Some day a girl will love you for the other areas of your life besides your dick. Whether it be for your personality, financial stability, or physical appearance. Work on everything and never give up. I am 100% convinced that even a man without a penis could be with a dream girl. In loving my ex so hard I found myself accepting her flaws and finding them lovable in an excruciating way. Some day your dream girl will find your flaws lovable in the same way and will do anything to stay with you. Until then work on what you can in order to find and keep her.

I won't be giving up at least because I know there is a chance for me to be happy someday.
Even if there is a minuscule chance that I can find happiness in my future, a shred of a damn chance that I can feel sexually at peace with a beautiful or caring woman, I believe that it's worth dying for. That's the only thing that keeps me going.

-V


stopthismadness

I won't lie, I'm still feeling pretty much at the lowest I've felt these past 9 years, and I spontaneously broke into tears while driving home today. I've been having some very unhealthy thoughts go through my head more and more frequently. I could not absorb anything while sitting in class today either because of it. I need to try to arrest this somehow, some way.  thank you all for your kind words, I appreciate it so very much. Nobody else would be able to understand.  

RoyHobbs

If your at your wits end then maybe it's time to consider surgery and possibly an implant. I know this sucks. I'm 36 and have had this for over two years now. Somedays I'm like "oh it doesn't look too bad." And then a day later I'm like "it really looks awful. Did shrink again?" Explore all your options. If you're having dark thoughts then why wouldn't you explore all your options. If money's an issue look into credit or a loan.  

james1947

stopthismadness

I will second RoyHobbs on the implant issue. You should consider it seriously.
I read about people as young as 19 that have done it and they are very pleased.
I wish I had the finance to do that because Peyronies ruined my known life.
I am proposing you to write a PM to JackP (sorry Jack loading you :)) and also read his blog.
I know you are young but you are around on the forum for long time. In my opinion, you should make some drastic movement to change your life and this movement is to get an implant.

James
Age 71, Peyronies from Jan 2009 following penis fracture during sex. Severe ED.
Lost 2" length and a lot of girth. Late start, still VED, Cialis & Pentox helped. Prostate surgery 2014.
Got amazing support on the forum

Noway

im 27 and ed is my major problem also and i know its not  psychological by any mean and im tired of some urologists blaming it on that when its not the freaking issue. If they figure that men at a young age cant have ed or its impossible then they should find another profession and let professionals handle it.

jackp

Noway

I don't know why most of these doctors do not understand that a young man can have ED. I know that several have been to as many as 10 doctors and most tell them the same thing, come back when you are 40. Some of these doctors are in great institutions like M D Anderson in Houston Texas.  Some like a doctor in New Orleans want to experiment on them.

Dr. Milam believes that a man, of any age, that has peyronies and ED needs the same professional care.  Up to and including an implant.  There are before and after pictures of a 24 year old single young man on my blog. It has turned his life completely around.

I would recommend you print the article called "Mending Broken Hearts" in the surgery thread and take it to the doctor. Don't give up there is hope and help, you just have to find the right doctor.

Jackp
http://jackp-penileimplant.blogspot.com

MattFoley

Stopthismadness,

From this point and my perspective, you have two options:

(1) Get an implant like the one Jackp got and talks about. He's your "go to guy" on that implant, which sounds damn good to me.

(2) Hang in there and give VED, traction, Pentox, Peptides, PRP, Stem cell, etc. a chance to fix the situation. Also, have you checked your testosterone? Have you had a scam done of your penis and checked for venous leakage? Some of the other guys here will disagree on using Quadmix but I use it and I get a great erection from it. You may wish to talk to your doctor about it. From me, it's like 10 times as strong as Viagra.

Whatever you decide to do, remember it's your life and your choice. Don't stay miserable.

Lastly, if you can get your erection situation worked out, consider having a professional sex therapist assist you in determining best sexual positions for your Peyronie's. PM me if you want a good website to go to for that kind of assistance.

Keep your spirits up. We'll figure this out together.
Got Testosterone?

stopthismadness

I'm not ready to give in to getting an implant at my age, I truly believe I would still feel the same way if I got one this young, no offense to anyone that has, and I appreciate the advice on it.  If it works for you, it works. Life is rough, and I'm going to keep trying as much as I can. I'll be ordering a VED soon, and trying the Phalosan device for awhile as far as extenders. All the same old supplements, daily tadalafil, l arginine, pycnogenol, pentox again soon hopefully etc.

My testosterone was normal last time I had it checked. I had a scan done years ago showing that I had scar tissue preventing blood from being trapped in the distal end, and well, then the urologist really ruined me. Just read back on my posts if you want to know about that, as I really don't want to even bring it up again.

Not really sure about peptides or using them on myself, that's new to me. I've read about them, but obtaining them?  And the specific types? No idea about it. If you care to enlighten, I'm all ears. Concerning PRP, it's been on my mind for sure. Still want to see more from it though. I obviously don't want to stay miserable... it's difficult as you all know. I feel like maybe now isn't my time, but if I don't give in and I wait it out something may come, or some of these therapies will show some benefit long term. I hope so anyway.  

MattFoley

I've used peptides for bodybuilding but not for my penis. I'm starting to research peptides for direct penis injection. I'll keep everyone informed as I pursue that line of treatment.

If I can budget it, I'll buy a centrifuge and see what trouble I can get into.

In the meantime, you know what you have to do so keep at it and let's all pray for success.

Got Testosterone?