Has Anyone Been Able to Have Intercourse with a Soft Glans?

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Plowshare

I still get erections (including NTEs), but they ain't what they used to be. The last time I tried to have sex, I was unable to because of a soft glans (my shaft was rigid but my glans was flaccid). The psychological impact of watching my glans just mush up against gates of my partner's vagina was devastating to me (my glans was totally flaccid and just bent straight upward), and I quickly lost my erection. We tried again a few weeks later and the same thing happened. That's when I panicked.

I've seen a sexologist and a uro, who both think I should be fine. (Did many tests, pretty much everything except Doppler.) The uro pointed out to me that many men with penile implants have a soft glans and are still able to have sex.

This was about 3 years ago or so. I haven't tried to have sex since then and I basically pushed the issue into the back of my mind. Fast forward to today; I'm currently in a serious relationship with a lovely girl, whom I hope to marry. We haven't had sex yet, and I terrified about what might happen if we do. I've noticed what I believe is some improvement in the firmness of my glans over the last 3 years, but I don't know if it's enough for sex (it's at least not totally flaccid anymore).

Has anyone been able to have satisfactory intercourse with a soft glans?

Luciano

Quote from: Plowshare on April 09, 2012, 11:03:57 PM
I've seen a sexologist and a uro, who both think I should be fine. (Did many tests, pretty much everything except Doppler.) The uro pointed out to me that many men with penile implants have a soft glans and are still able to have sex.
Do some reading here on the forum, there are threads by guys with implants that speak about this topic. look for posts by jackp (he also has a very interesting blog).
If I recall correctly, I think he wrote that with implant hardness of glan can come back after 4weeks to 3 years (I could be wrong with the figures)

BUT nevertheless, you should do a doppler also, to see why bloodflow is not irrigating the gland. I think the risk of having problems after induced erection are minimal, as you can have those injections also to treat ED.

Also be aware that bloodflow in the penis is 50% psychological. So if you think you will fail, then sure enough YOU WILL FAIL.

What I would do in your situation, is talk to her about it. Mainly saying you dont know if it will work out.. (say you had an accident or something like that and that its getting better but that YOU are afraid she will not like you any more)
This will make her courious...and at the same time she will not want to be reduced to someone who only wants sex. (as you have been together with her without having some)
So if you describe it much worse than it actually is, she will be positively  surprised that its not as bad as you described. Her reaction will give you more self confidence, etc.. etc..
That is what I would do.. but of course every one of us is different.

Luc

jackp

Plowshare

From your post you are describing venous leakage. It can be measured by a urologist using Color Doppler with an induced erection. Today a lot of specialist just go by symptoms.

Yes it is possible to have intercourse with a soft glans. First a lot of exciting foreplay. Use a good lube like Astroglide. When ready for intercourse put your partner's behind on a pillow that will change the angle of penetration just enough to allow for better penetration.

I have a penile implant and mentor a lot of men going through it just like yourself. They are all ages form 20 up.

The implant used and the doctor doing the surgery are important to prevent a floppy glans with an implant. The length expanding implant will hold the glans firmly until glans erections return. The non lengthening implants will not. A good graphic is at www.amslgx.com/

What happens with an implant is the cylinders are implanted in the corpus Cavernosum (CC). The CC no longer requires blood flow to maintain an erection. Over time that blood flow will redirect to the Corpus Sponglosum (CS) and glans. Younger men tend to have it return sooner than us older men. I know a young man that this happend for in 4 weeks. In older men it can take 2+ years. In my case glans erections returned in about 16 months.

You do not want a general practice urologist for this. You need a Male Sexual Function / Urodynamic Specialist that specializes in men with peyronies, peyronies with hourglassing, and ED. There are only about 4 in the US so you may have to travel to get to one of the great ones.

There is a lot of great information on this forum. The first thing you need to do is start a daily VED exercise to keep your penis healthy. I used the single cylinder one that is posted in the VED thread. There is more information in my blog.

Any thing I can do to assist you let me know. I will be happy to answer any question either here or my email, jwp104@att.net There is hope and help.

Jackp
http://jackp-penileimplant.blogspot.com/



Plowshare

Thanks for the replies guys.

@ Luciano - I've told my girlfriend about it and she's completely un-phased by everything I've told her about peyronie's and my experiences with ED. She's done nothing but be supportive, encouraging and 100% behind me every step of the way. She's fantastic.

As for the Doppler, I don't really see any reason to do it right now. I figure I'll find out everything I need to know from my next sexual encounter. If it's a success then no Doppler and no other tests or treatments, if I fail then I'll move towards treatment and consider doing a Doppler if a specialist recommends it.

@ Jackp

Can't tell you how much I appreciate your post. I felt reassured in reading it, and the detail about the pillow was exactly what I was looking for.

You could be right about the venous leakage, but I had an interesting experience this morning at around 2:30am. I woke up with a strong erection that I had little trouble maintaining. I moved all around in my bed, sat up, sat back down, got up on my knees lay back down, and my penis stayed rigid through all of it.

This is rare for me, so I took advantage of it and started examining myself. I was able to determine a lot. I paid close attention to my glans and found that it engorged best when I lay on my right side. I also noticed that my left CC was supporting my glans, but my right CC was providing very little support to my glans, if any.

This makes sense because most of my scarring is on my right side. I believe my scars are preventing my right CC from extending into the back of my glans. I believe this is the reason why I'm experiencing a soft glans!

Not only did I learn a lot from self examination, but I also found a ton of hope and encouragement in it.

I still have a bend and my glans doesn't engorge as much as it could, but my shaft seems to be rigid enough for coitus. I believe that with a little experimentation and a helpful partner, I'll be able to have sex!

The intromission part of sex has been the thing that I've been most worried about (because of my soft glans). I feel like once I'm in I'll be home free.  :)

Thanks again for the replies!

nemo

Plowshare, I've had Peyronie's for about 11 years now (I'm 40).  Had an acute case that then subsided leaving me relatively straight again - with the main lasting effect being a soft glans.  Like you, my shaft will get hard, but due to the Peyronies Disease scarring near the glans, blood flow into the glans is either pinched off or the vessels suffer leakage (really doesn't matter which as the effect is the same). Hard shaft, soft glans.

Does it bother me - yes, I dislike it. But, it's infinitely better than some of the effects Peyronies Disease can have, so count your blessings.

As to penetration - honestly, I can't imagine a vagina so tight that when its owner is properly stimulated (i.e. "wet") you have trouble penetrating. Now, in all honesty, where this does cause me problems is with (and pardon my frankness here) anal sex. I find it exceedingly difficult to penetrate this much tighter orifice. But a vagina has never caused me any problem whatsoever.

The bottom line, as far as I'm concerned, is that a soft glans is one of the least severe impacts we could suffer from Peyronies Disease. In truth, I think it's far more of a concern to us than it is to our partners, who are generally far too concerned about the tiny flaws of their own body to be worried about the relative hardness of the glans of our penis. To them, I suspect it's a non-issue.  

So, try to stop worrying and enjoy your partner. I guarantee you - if nothing else - once you're "inside" you will BOTH forget all about a soft glans.  

Regards,
Nemo
51 yrs. old, multiple auto-immune conditions. First episode of Peyronies Disease in 2002. Recurred a couple times since. Over the years I have tried Topical Verapamil, Iontophoresis, all the supps and Cialis + Pentoxifylline. Still functional, always worried.

Plowshare

Nemo,

Thanks so much for sharing. I feel a tremendous amount of relief from reading your reply. Hopefully this thread will also encourage other men who have the same problem not to give up!

You're right about this:

Quote from: Nemo on April 12, 2012, 12:30:49 PM
The bottom line, as far as I'm concerned, is that a soft glans is one of the least severe impacts we could suffer from Peyronies Disease. In truth, I think it's far more of a concern to us than it is to our partners, who are generally far too concerned about the tiny flaws of their own body to be worried about the relative hardness of the glans of our penis. To them, I suspect it's a non-issue.  

So, try to stop worrying and enjoy your partner. I guarantee you - if nothing else - once you're "inside" you will BOTH forget all about a soft glans.  

Thanks again,

Plow

rams

have you been able to have sex/penetrate with this girl? I have hardflaccid and have soft glans and i couldnt penetrate either but she wasnt that wet i think. Can you penetrate with soft glans???????????

james1947

Rams

My private experience with soft glans:
Can penetrate if if is wet as you say, I mean if she is ready and have enough self lubricant or you use plenty of lubricant.

James
Age 71, Peyronies from Jan 2009 following penis fracture during sex. Severe ED.
Lost 2" length and a lot of girth. Late start, still VED, Cialis & Pentox helped. Prostate surgery 2014.
Got amazing support on the forum

rams

soo you just carry lubricant with you and how come the kid who started this post couldnt penetrate. That scares me

james1947

Rams

I don't know if Plowshare is a kid :) as I don't know his age.
Regarding lubricant, you may not need to carry it if you will be more aware to your sex partner needs to be ready ;D
If you will read carefully this topic posts, you may learn a few things :)

James
Age 71, Peyronies from Jan 2009 following penis fracture during sex. Severe ED.
Lost 2" length and a lot of girth. Late start, still VED, Cialis & Pentox helped. Prostate surgery 2014.
Got amazing support on the forum

restore

from Nemo's post:  "The bottom line, as far as I'm concerned, is that a soft glans is one of the least severe impacts we could suffer from Peyronies Disease"


Nemo, I too have the issue of a firm shaft with erection, but a soft glans.  I have to disagree with you on this being one of the least severe impacts of Peyronies Disease, my glans hardly feels anything now.  I think a blood-filled hard glans is much more sensitive.  I'm just comparing to how it used to feel before Peyronies Disease.

 

LWillisjr

There are more nerve receptors on the glans and corona per square inch than anywhere else on your body. I don't see how a soft or hard glans would make this any more or any less sensitive. And I don't see how a soft glans on top of hard erection shaft would create any issue with penetration.
Developed peyronies 2007 - 70 degree dorsal curve
Traction/MEDs/Injections/Surgery 2008 16 years Peyronies free now
My History

restore


Hawk

This might be obvious but glan size is a direct result of degree of erection.  To some degree it can be influenced by blocked blood flow to the corpus spongiosum. Generally Viagra (or similar drug), L-arginine, a VED, or a restriction band (cock ring) all will help engorge the glans.  Many men with an implant do not get an engorged glans if they had total ED before the implant as is often the case.  Most report no issues with penetration or sensation.  Very soon after prostate surgery I could have an orgasm with a penis as flaccid as a empty flap of skin so I do not think a soft glans has much to do with loss of sensation.
Prostatectomy 2004, radiation 2009, currently 70 yrs old
After pills, injections, VED - Dr Eid, Titan 22cm implant 8/7/18
Hawk - Updated 10/27/18 - Peyronies Society Forums

restore

Maybe there's a certain arousal factor that I'm not taking into consideration.  I mean for me, even though my pain from peyronie's has diminished considerably over the past couple years, and I'm straighter, and can hardly feel the lump anymore (thank you Pentox), it STILL is not the same pleasureable feeling during sex I used to have before this disease.

And I really do think a hard glans has more feeling.  Isn't that the case for everyone?  You don't walk around feeling every nuance of sensation of your clothes rubbing on your glans do you?  If one were to brush a soft, light feather across the glans of a flaccid penis, the feeling is not as delightful as the same thing across a very strong erection.  I'm not saying you can't have an orgasm with a soft glans (obviously you can), but is it the same intensity, leading up to, and at the finish?

Hawk

Quote from: restore on October 16, 2012, 12:40:43 PM
You don't walk around feeling every nuance of sensation of your clothes rubbing on your glans do you?  If one were to brush a soft, light feather across the glans of a flaccid penis, the feeling is not as delightful as the same thing across a very strong erection.  I'm not saying you can't have an orgasm with a soft glans (obviously you can), but is it the same intensity, leading up to, and at the finish?
Just an opinion, I am not trying to make lite of your valid question, but I suspect your feather question deals more with psychological arousal than the degree of actual sensation with an engorged glans.  I could say the same thing for a feather rubbing over my ass when I was hiking out of the woods lugging a dead turkey as opposed to if Catherine Zita Jones was using a feather to tease me.  One would be intense and I would not even be aware of the other but it would have nothing to do with my butt being engorged. It would have to do with my mental focus and how I interpreted the sensation in my mind.  I have had some of the most intense orgasms I have ever had with a totally flaccid penis and no one was more shocked than I was at the time.  I sometimes hear men say that after prostate surgery sex is never as good.  I have also heard men say the same thing about after their wives had a baby that it did not feel as good to the man.  I think we often let hangups get inside our head and the brain is our biggest sex organ.
Prostatectomy 2004, radiation 2009, currently 70 yrs old
After pills, injections, VED - Dr Eid, Titan 22cm implant 8/7/18
Hawk - Updated 10/27/18 - Peyronies Society Forums

restore

that's encouraging Hawk.  I need some good news lately.  I have to say, improvements have come in my condition, I can see them.  Just haven't felt them yet.  

rams

why could plowshare not penetrate. i have soft glans and i coudlnt either, how wet does she have to be

Hawk

Quote from: rams on October 16, 2012, 08:43:46 PM
why could plowshare not penetrate. i have soft glans and i coudlnt either, how wet does she have to be

I have no idea how to answer that question.  
Prostatectomy 2004, radiation 2009, currently 70 yrs old
After pills, injections, VED - Dr Eid, Titan 22cm implant 8/7/18
Hawk - Updated 10/27/18 - Peyronies Society Forums

rams

why couldnt he have sex man. its F^@$!ng with my head. Plowshare is like me so does that mean i cant have sex??? Like why couldnt he penetrate and you all could. And i couldnt so was it because she wasnt wet enough....like how long does it take to get her wet. And how can we assume the girl plowshare tried to have sex wasnt wet....maybe soft glans cant penetrate.


Please help me with some relief my heads going crazy

james1947

Rams

As I have written before, I have also soft gland and ED,  :( never really 100% hard  :( and can penetrate if my wife enough wet ;D, if not I can't also. :(
If you will give her oral, than you can really feel when she is ready. ;)
Again, is my own experience, other people may have other experience, but I am proposing you to try my advice. :)

James
Age 71, Peyronies from Jan 2009 following penis fracture during sex. Severe ED.
Lost 2" length and a lot of girth. Late start, still VED, Cialis & Pentox helped. Prostate surgery 2014.
Got amazing support on the forum

rams

so how often do u have trouble penetrating. And what if ur glans fill up a little bit and does a condom have enough lubricant.  

james1947

I don't have trouble penetrating with glans that fill up little bit, I take care always to have enough natural lubrication.
Regarding condoms, I think they have very little bit lubricant, maybe not enough, but I am not a condom expert.

James
Age 71, Peyronies from Jan 2009 following penis fracture during sex. Severe ED.
Lost 2" length and a lot of girth. Late start, still VED, Cialis & Pentox helped. Prostate surgery 2014.
Got amazing support on the forum

rams

just give me one reason why plowshare couldnt penetrate. kind of mad he cant be reached anymore

james1947

Difficult to answer your question without Plowshare and can't ask Plowshare because he was last active at May 21, 2012, 12:12:55 AM

James
Age 71, Peyronies from Jan 2009 following penis fracture during sex. Severe ED.
Lost 2" length and a lot of girth. Late start, still VED, Cialis & Pentox helped. Prostate surgery 2014.
Got amazing support on the forum

Hawk

Rams,  Stop obsessing.   Forgive me for not remembering your background but you sound like you have never or seldom had sex.  If you have an erect shaft you can have sex regardless of a soft tip. Common sense and imagination make that very clear.  You don't have to order sex toys and experiment on yourself to know that.  

I think we have pretty much talked this subject to death.
Prostatectomy 2004, radiation 2009, currently 70 yrs old
After pills, injections, VED - Dr Eid, Titan 22cm implant 8/7/18
Hawk - Updated 10/27/18 - Peyronies Society Forums

rams

do you think that cbijk was talking about not being able to penetrate in this thread
hes on the 2nd page, let me know this would kill my axiety if he wasnt??? pleasehelp

james1947

Rams

The link in your post is to a COMMERCIAL SITE that sales penis enlargement devices etc'.
You can base your information and understanding on what you have read there but it is not connected to Peyronies.
You post was edited not to include the link.

James
Age 71, Peyronies from Jan 2009 following penis fracture during sex. Severe ED.
Lost 2" length and a lot of girth. Late start, still VED, Cialis & Pentox helped. Prostate surgery 2014.
Got amazing support on the forum

rams

I read this How to Deal with Sex Problems: Head of penis doesn't become erect., performance anxiety erectile dysfunction. and it has put me in huge depression. Why can some people not penetrate with soft glans. I don't understand. does it bend or something?

james1947

I like Dr Andrew Rynne exceptional capability diagnosing by the Internet just from reading a patient letter. ;D
I wish many other doctors will have this phenomenal capability.

James
Age 71, Peyronies from Jan 2009 following penis fracture during sex. Severe ED.
Lost 2" length and a lot of girth. Late start, still VED, Cialis & Pentox helped. Prostate surgery 2014.
Got amazing support on the forum

LWillisjr

Don't let it put you into depression. We don't know anything about this guy other than what he posted. Once talking with someone I usually find there are others issues that are related or there can be other complications.

I also don't understand the soft glans description. It might interfere some with penetration, but I don't see how it would prevent penetration all together.

Factor in the fact that as James said, the doctor can suddenly diagnose his condition with a quick and single post, and just come to my web site and I'll fix everything. Yeah..... sure.
Developed peyronies 2007 - 70 degree dorsal curve
Traction/MEDs/Injections/Surgery 2008 16 years Peyronies free now
My History

rams

I feel like crying, I cant handle this stress at my age. I feel like ill never be able to have sex and even if its posisble i wont ever know cause i have huge anxiety thinking about this soft glans preventing me from ever having intercourse.

RoyHobbs

Rams- you should reread the replies in this thread. If a soft glans is your only issue you can still have sex. I know because I have. And over time with VED and oral treatments my erections have regained some firmness. Relax, friend.

rams

My penis doesnt get fully hard, but it isn't super floppy. Just maybe near the head a little bit...IDK im scared

james1947

Rams

RoyHobbs expressed my opinion also. Be proactive, don't let yourself down!!!

James
Age 71, Peyronies from Jan 2009 following penis fracture during sex. Severe ED.
Lost 2" length and a lot of girth. Late start, still VED, Cialis & Pentox helped. Prostate surgery 2014.
Got amazing support on the forum

rams

I tried to penetrate like a few months ago but she wasnt wet and i couldnt, idk what to do

LWillisjr

Have you ever heard of or tried a lubricant?

I don't have a soft glans and my wife and I still use a lubrcant. It just makes things easier.
Developed peyronies 2007 - 70 degree dorsal curve
Traction/MEDs/Injections/Surgery 2008 16 years Peyronies free now
My History

MattFoley

I support what RoyHobbs and others are saying about VED and improving circulation. I started using it only recently and I noticed my penis hanging fuller and my erections a slight bit better. Also, the plaque seems to get softer. I'm starting to feel happier about the prospects for recovery.

Got Testosterone?

rams

I know a bunch of you have soft glans, but any of your glans completley soft like they don't fill at all and you can still have sex?

MattFoley

I've definitely had sex with a "softer" glan but not totally soft. The key is getting blood flow back into the upper part of the penis. VED and traction along with Pentox are pretty much the solution right now. For me, it also helped to use Quadmix.
Got Testosterone?

panther

I know exactly how you feel. It is very discouraging.  You need to use the KY intense lube for her.  That way she gets a warming sensation and it will hopefully help you enter.  

rams

So nobody has completely soft glans, are you all saying I cant have sex? That's fcking awesome

LWillisjr

Try re-reading the posts.

I think we saying that with caution and sufficient lube that you CAN have sex.
Developed peyronies 2007 - 70 degree dorsal curve
Traction/MEDs/Injections/Surgery 2008 16 years Peyronies free now
My History

rams

Please read this Dead glans and probable hard flaccid NEED HELP. He says soft glans smush up during penetration. Omg im so scared, I can't sleep or anything. I cant have sex now can I? My glans are totally flaccid, and I remember trying to penetrate and it smushed a little bit but i just played it off because i didnt get her wet. What should I do? Should I just accept I can never have sex again, cialis doesnt work. FUCKKK.


PLEASE IM BEGGING SOMEONE. PLEASE SOMEONE WITH 100 PECENT TOTAL SOFT GLANS, COMMENT AND TELL ME IF YOU CAN HAVE SEX PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD. I NEED TO GET MY HEAD SETTLED AS QUICKLY AS POSSIBLE

And I want a response from someone who has completely dead glans

rams


RoyHobbs

You haven't tried re-reading the posts, have you? More than one of us have suggested doing so because your question has already been answered. You can have sex. Just be careful about it.

LWillisjr

Rams,
I don't understand why you keep asking. The links you post state the strong corpora chambers is what you need for penetration. A hard or soft glans is not necessary. And you keep asking "can you". You won't know until you try.

How old are you, what is your condition, and what are your worries about this?

Developed peyronies 2007 - 70 degree dorsal curve
Traction/MEDs/Injections/Surgery 2008 16 years Peyronies free now
My History

damian

rams, if you have just hard-flaccid, go to the hard-flaccid forum and try to READ what other guys are posting. Many guys got rid of hard-flaccid and stressing about it will make it worse.

rams

the guy with hardflaccid/soft glans says his glans smush upon penetration. Im just looking for one person with completely soft glans to explain if they can penetrate?

damian